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The 2010 Person of The Year

December 30, 2010

After much thought, we here at have finally decided upon our selection for the 2010 Person of The Year. Are you ready for the results?

2010, like 2009 and 2008 before it, has been a trying time for many. A military overseas, an economy struggling to regain footing, a political climate fractured by greedy corporate swines, there’s a lot about the year that we’d rather forget.

But this time of year is also a reason to look back and celebrate the good in our nation. The people that stood above the fray, ventured forward and tried to make our country proud. That is why, after months of listing and re-listing, contemplation and deliberation, we’ve chosen our pick for 2010’s Person of The Year…



Brandon Marcus

In what can only be described as a banner year for him, Brandon Marcus achieved many goals while still looking forward to the future.

With his spirit of ingenuity and perseverance, Brandon Marcus has fit the profile of the Person of The Year. He’s a shining example for all of us during these difficult times.

Among his many highlights of 2010:

  • May 18: Turned in two old games at Gamestop and received $20 off his copy of Red Dead Redemption.
  • June 6: After a bad call during Game 2 of the NBA Finals, Brandon accidentally combined the words “fuck” and “heck” to create the popular catchphrase “What the huck?” (Also popular: “Are you hucking kidding me?”)
  • July 11: On a red eye flight to New York, Brandon watched the first twenty minutes of Date Night before realizing it was dubbed in Spanish.
  • July 15: During a train ride across New England, Brandon beat five levels of Plants vs. Zombies in only 30 minutes. He also found a working power outlet for his phone after searching for only three minutes.
  • September 15: Brandon publicly endorsed John Kitzhaber for governor of Oregon. Kitzhaber would later go on to win the election.

These are only a few of the many triumphs for Brandon, which included his completion of the aforementioned Red Dead Redemption and an occasional trip to the gym. In one of his gym outings, Brandon ran a record 9.2 miles while sporadically laughing at an episode of Jimmy Kimmel Live. Fellow gym members were impressed, one even gave him a polite head-nod.

Picture courtesy of Annie Leibovitz

In a year of spider squishings and waking up at 7:30 more than twice, the biggest challenge still must have been Brandon’s move across town (dubbed “The Big Move” by the mainstream press). When Brandon and his girlfriend decided they wanted to find a new apartment, they planned on staying in the Northwest part of town. However, after some searching, they found a good apartment in the east side. The move would be more considerable than originally planned. He inspired a nation when he went on record saying, “It’s kinda far away but it’s a hundred dollars cheaper and I’m pretty sure it has a laundry unit.” Americans rallied behind the couple as they commenced their move and cheered when they purchased a sofa that was 30% off at Target.

It was a year of difficult tasks and joyous accomplishments and Mr. Marcus has held a heroic pose throughout, never waning or  faltering. Many great things were said about him this year, such as: “Nicely done, Brandon” and “You can leave at 6:45 if you’d like” and “Sir, would you like your change?” and “Are you sure? You handed me a twenty.”

These last twelve months have been divisive for many reasons but all Americans can agree that Brandon Marcus has held his head high above it all.

What comes next for 2010’s Person of The Year? Many things, including a quest to watch every James Bond film in order and probably one or two haircuts. He’s also looking for a cheap Blu-Ray player if anyone has one. Regardless of where 2011 takes him, we can rest assured that he’ll make us all very proud. is proud to present the 2010 Person of The Year Award to Brandon Marcus.


One Comment leave one →
  1. December 30, 2010 4:13 pm

    I love this. You are the new definition of man, HEAR THAT WORLD!? THE BAR HAS BEEN RAISED!

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