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No internet, no peace

October 6, 2010

Well, that’s it folks. I’m done for. Nice knowing you. Thanks for coming, see you on the other side.

Friends, my home internet is experiencing some problems. It’s slowed considerably and my provider is currently trying to fix it. Yet, until it’s fixed I’m living in bandwidth limbo. My downloads are slow, my videos are constantly buffering and don’t even get me started on podcasts. Essentially I’m living in the year 1998.

It’s usable but impaired and, in the end, is an impaired internet even real internet at all?

This leads me to think about how much we use the internet. Our society is glued to its computers, for emails to entertainment, from finances to travel. It makes me sick when I really think about it.

Do you see how reliant on technology we’ve become? Look at me, I’m like a baby without its mother! I can’t go five minutes without checking my email or Facebook or Twitter or updating my damn Netflix queue. This is no life at all.

I’m a monster!

That’s it, no more Internet! You hear me, technology? I will not be your slave! There’s so many others things I could be doing, I’ve got so much life to live.

You heard right Internet, I am done with you. I am off to do something productive with my life. I’m going to go out and enjoy the sunshine. I’m going to live to the fullest. Today is the first day of the rest of my life! Farewell, Internet. Thanks for nothing!

UPDATE: My internet’s fixed. Forget all that shit I just said. Anyone want to play Minecraft?

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